a goal...

I've been thinking a lot lately about gratitude and being truly present in the moments of my life, and how that relates to singing and performing. I am so grateful to have this amazing job that brings joy and communicates to people on a deep level. It seems to me the best way to show that gratitude, and the best means to opening the most direct line of communication, is by being as present as possible, moment to moment, in performance. It's not that I'm generally un-present during performances (in fact, I've always felt very involved, mentally and emotionally) but it has occurred to me as I've explored these concepts in other areas of my life lately that a deeper level of awareness is possible, and the St. Matthew seems the perfect opportunity to play with this idea. At the dress rehearsal on Wednesday night, I experimented with taking a moment before my arias to focus my energy on the beauty of the music, the meaning of the text, and what I wanted to convey in my interpretation, and one of the arias in particular was a truly transformative experience. For me, that is. I can't speak for the audience, though the feedback I got from my fellow soloists was very positive. So tonight, at the performance, my goal is to be completely present every time I breathe to sing a phrase, aware of the power and exquisite beauty of this music and the message I'd like to convey.